Keep It Up and I’ll Set Your TTL to 1 unisex organic cotton tee

Description

Cross me, and your packets will never make it past the first hop.

This is the network equivalent of “I will end you.” Not with violence. Not with words. But with a single digit. TTL = 1.For the non-technical: TTL (Time To Live) determines how many network “hops” a packet can make before it expires and dies. A normal TTL is 64 or 128. A TTL of 1 means your packet dies immediately after leaving your device. You’re basically isolated from the internet while technically still connected.

It’s the perfect crime. No violence. No damage. Just… digital exile.

This shirt is for network administrators, sysadmins, and IT professionals who have the power—and occasionally the temptation—to make someone’s network experience very, very bad.

WHAT IS TTL?
Technical Explanation:
Time To Live (TTL) is a field in IP packets that limits how many routers (hops) a packet can pass through before being discarded. Each router decrements the TTL by 1. When TTL reaches 0, the packet dies.

Normal TTL values:
Windows: 128
Linux: 64
Routers/Network devices: 255

TTL = 1 means:
Your packet can make ONE hop. That’s it. It dies at the first router. You can’t reach ANYTHING beyond your immediate network.
Translation: “I’m not blocking you. Your packets just… don’t survive. Weird, right?”

• 100% organic ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 5.3 oz./yd.² (180 g/m²)
• Single jersey
• Medium fit
• Set-in sleeves
• 1 × 1 rib at collar
• Wide double-needle topstitch on the sleeves and bottom hems
• Self-fabric neck tape (inside, back of the neck)
• The fabric of this product holds certifications for its organic cotton content under GOTS (Global Organic Textile Standard) and OCS (Organic Content Standard)
• The fabric of this product is OEKO-TEX Standard 100 certified and PETA-Approved Vegan

The sizes correspond to a smaller size in the US market, so US customers should order a size up.

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS:
Q: Can you really set someone’s TTL to 1?
A: If you control the router/firewall between them and the internet? Absolutely.
Q: Is this legal?
A: We’re not lawyers, but… probably depends on your company policy and whether you have authorization to manage network configs. Don’t do crimes.
Q: Would this actually work?
A: Yes. Their packets would die at the first hop. They’d be “connected” but unable to reach anything. Perfect digital purgatory.
Q: Can they tell you did it?
A: If they’re technical enough to check TTL values and trace route results, maybe. Most users? No clue.
Q: What’s the most common reason to actually adjust TTL?
A: Legitimate reasons include: security policies, network troubleshooting, reducing network congestion. Revenge is not typically listed in the manual.
Q: Can I wear this if I don’t have network admin access?
A: Sure, but you’re making a threat you can’t back up. That’s bold.
Q: What if someone asks what TTL means?
A: “Time To Live. It controls how long your packets survive on the network.” Then smile mysteriously.
Q: Is this the most passive-aggressive network threat?
A: It’s up there with “I’ll add you to the QoS lowest priority queue” and “Your MAC address is now on the blacklist.”

WARNING LABEL:
Side effects may include: increased respect from fellow IT professionals, nervous laughter from users who understand the reference, explaining TCP/IP to confused relatives, the temptation to actually set someone’s TTL to 1, power trips about infrastructure control, and establishing yourself as someone not to be crossed.

May cause: Users giving you a wider berth, IT colleagues nodding approvingly, non-technical people asking “is that a thing you can do?”, sudden awareness of your god-like network powers, and the occasional evil laugh while adjusting firewall rules.

Warning: This shirt does not grant you network administrator privileges. If you don’t already have the power to adjust TTL settings, wearing this is aspirational at best. Do not actually weaponize network infrastructure for personal vendettas (officially). Your network management decisions should be based on legitimate business and security needs (wink wink).

Produced and shipped using a global production and shipping company. They’re probably just around the corner from you!

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!

Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the EU REACH requirements.

In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Just Buy the Damn Shirt and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at 99 King Street, MELBOURNE VIC 3000 or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.